A more practical approach to purpose
Earlier this year, my husband and I spent a long weekend on the west side of Michigan. We drove over mid-week after work. It was raining, and both our minds were racing with work stress. (It wasn’t exactly a fun car ride.)
He queued up a podcast: How to Find Your Purpose on The Happiness Lab. I love this podcast, but I’ve always struggled with the topic of purpose. Big conversations about “why” feel heavy, and I wasn’t exactly in an open-minded headspace. We listened anyway, and unsurprisingly, I learned.
My biggest takeaway was the idea of little p purpose. Instead of searching for a single, all-defining “why” (what the episode calls Big P Purpose), we can build a meaningful life through the small things that consistently light us up, without some grand epiphany.
For me, Big P Purpose often feels pressure-filled and achievement-oriented. Little p purpose, on the other hand, is about building (not finding) a life rooted in everyday meaning, curiosity, and joy.
So how do we actually build it? Here were a few ideas from the episode that stuck with me:
Stop looking for it externally. Let go of what parents, peers, or social media tell us our purpose should be. Little p purpose starts with our inner spark, not someone else’s definition of success.
Find our “purpose anchors.” These are moments or activities that make us feel energized and when time flies. Start there, and do more of those.
Ask simple questions. What excites us? What brings us joy just because it does? We don’t need to justify it as productive or profitable. Joy is enough.
Look forward, through the lens of regret. Imagine ourselves at the end of our life. What do we wish we’d done more of? Less of? Regret often points us toward what really matters.
Look backward, through the lens of childhood. Before grades and goals, what did we love doing as a kid? What did we spend hours doing just for fun?
Use the spaghetti method. Just try things. Throw them at the wall, and see what sticks. Then ask: Did that light me up?
We often feel our jobs have to be our purpose. At least I did. And while it’s great when that’s true, it’s not the only way. Little p purpose helps me see that more. Because purpose rarely shows up as a single sentence and source, but rather in how we spend our time, who we help consistently, and even what we choose not to pursue.
Especially at this time of year when we’re reflecting on what’s behind us and setting goals for what’s ahead, little p purpose offers a more grounded approach, not a grand declaration: a series of small, intentional choices to do more of what makes us feel aligned and alive.
