What I’m learning from lily pads

I always have a plan.

I workshop scenarios, weigh risks, and document options. I once built a spreadsheet mapping different life scenarios through 2055. Maybe you can relate.

Recently I read Directional Living, and one idea stuck: the lily pad approach.

Picture a video game. You’re on one side of a river with no clear path across. You spot a nearby lily pad, but nothing beyond that. You pace the riverbank trying to plan every step. But nothing clicks until you actually step onto that first pad. It holds. Then another appears. Then another.

The catch is you’ll never see the full path in advance. The way forward only reveals itself when you step.

You mean step without seeing at least three moves ahead? Too risky. Too reckless. I’m good right here on solid ground, thanks.

But am I?

Solid, predictable ground feels safe, but of course we can’t plan everything—no matter how many spreadsheets we make. Life is unpredictable, and the things that matter most (eg, fulfillment, growth, curiosity) rarely come from perfectly mapped plans.

They’re found out on the lily pads.

So what does this look like—not in a video game but in real life? 

The lily pad approach means focusing on the next aligned action, not the ultimate outcome.

Practically speaking, this could look like:

• Asking “what’s the next right step?” instead of “what’s the perfect plan?”

• Saying “I don’t know… yet” with curiosity instead of shame

• Starting before you're fully ready, trusting you'll figure it out along the way

• Letting go of needing every variable to be known before taking action

• Viewing experiments as learning, not failures

• Being open to (and okay with) nonlinear progress

• Letting go of “shoulds” and timelines that no longer serve you

It means we don’t need to know the whole path—just the next step. And while that still makes me a little anxious, it also feels strangely freeing. There’s peace in giving up control and accepting that uncertainty is a feature, not a flaw, of real life. 

It doesn’t mean I’ll stop planning completely. (I still love my spreadsheets.) But I’m focusing less on destination and more on direction, less on control and more on alignment. I’m designing less and discovering more—thanks to what I’m learning from lily pads.